Holiday Perspectives and Prospects

(Translation into most languages at tab to the right.)

The holidays are upon us. Some believe that it’s our perspective that makes all the difference in how we feel about them. Looking ahead may fill a person with joyful anticipation of what’s planned, dogged determination to make it through, or a feeling of dread and desire to escape. But are these situations only just a matter of one’s perspective or one’s prospects? Is much of how we feel based on what is happening in our life: are we living with abundance, security, good health, and healthy relationships? Unsatisfying work, too much debt, illness, and strained relationships? Or is our income irregular or non-existent, our housing insecure or non-existent, and our relationships like vampires or non-existent?  

Certainly, if one lives in abundance, it is easier to have joyful anticipation of a time to slow down and be with loved ones than if you are living from week to week with financial pressures and conflict with family members or struggling with health or mental health issues. But for people living with addictions – or those living with loved ones trapped in addiction – holidays can be the worse time of the year. What is the likelihood of a day with joy-filled experiences? Not only the need to source their particular substance, or the absence of basic necessities, or minimal physical safety and shelter, but perhaps the most disheartening aspect of holidays for those with addictions is loneliness. I will never forget some of the holidays when our son was in active opioid addiction: The blank look in his eyes or the shame and dejection that weighed him down while loved ones were enjoying the day and each other. 

Our English word “holiday” comes from the Old English “Holy Day” and originally only referred to special religious days. Days set aside to worship with others and enjoy a meal together and rest. In the last century, holidays have morphed into something quite different for most of us, as evidenced in the dictionary: an extended period of leisure and recreation, especially one spent away from home or in travelling. This definition in itself points to an affluent lifestyle, one that less than five percent of the world’s population enjoys.

Yet I have seen joy even for people of humble circumstances or with the bare minimum of resources. Many times these are the very ones who have found ways to reach out and serve those among us who are struggling in one way or another. And this always challenges me: am I only thinking of my family and friends, or do I remember that if not for the grace of God, I could be in totally different circumstances, struggling to survive? How can I help lift someone up, even in a small way with an encouraging word or a meal or ride, so that this time of year isn’t filled with fear or dread or loneliness, but with hope?